#PlannerAddict - Little Dog Paper Co.

I am a self-proclaimed planner addict - I love my Erin Condren Life Planner (ECLP) and use it every day to plan out my week, my day, and even keep track of what I did on what day (you can tell I'm getting old when the first thing I do before bed is to check my planner for the next day to see what the F I have going on tomorrow).

I'm also a huge fan of color and whimsy - I love shabby chic, but I also love to make my planner look completely like my Hello Kitty influenced childhood. Unicorns. Flamingos (of course). Glitter (everywhere). Mermaids. Neo Blythe dolls.

I'm also an Etsy addict. Most people surf Facebook while they take a break from life. I surf Etsy. My wish list is at, like, 900+ items.

I found a May Mystery Collection from Little Dog Paper Co and love the idea of a kit for a month PLUS I love surprises. And mail surprises? THE BEST.

I loved her packaging. Super cute.

Fun planner mail from Little Dog Paper Co!

And here's what I did with the stickers included in the kit for the month.

My layout for this week

If you're a planner afficnationado like me, check her out on Etsy here.

Apparently I Killed It at Dinner

If you're like me, there are days where you're like, "I'm gonna kick dinner ASS" annnnnnd then there are the days where you're like, "So... peanut butter sandwiches all around?"

During the last few weeks of classes, I hardly ever feel like actual cooking. So we do a lot of sandwiches (and Silas wants Pizza Bites).

This past weekend I had the mental energy to cook and had gone grocery shopping (with a list, score!). I had actually menu planned.

It's crazy what happens when I'm not super stressed.

Get read to kill it at dinner with me.

Saturday we had Slow Cooker Beef Pot Roast and Perfect Parmesan Biscuits from Tastefully Simple.

Super easy Tastefully Simple biscuits

These were super popular once they cooled off...

My husband, Mike, who is pretty critical of my cooking skills (because he enjoys cooking while I'm like, "I'll bake... but...", actually came and told me that dinner was "perfection" and asked what I had done to the pot roast.

Cooked it? Followed the recipe? He didn't believe that it literally took ketchup, salt, pepper, and Worcestershire sauce. And water. And a slow cooker. *I love slow cookers...*

So here you go.

Go kill dinner.

You're welcome.

The Boys Clean Up...*badly*

Friday my husband lost his work keys and tore the house apart in order to find them.

Like you do.

And he still hasn't found them.

BUT in the process of "cleaning" (which means he goes through everything and then leaves a mess behind him and moves on), he and Silas went through the toy box and toy area. They made a pile of toys that they wanted to get rid of.

Which is GREAT. Except for the fact that a lot of those toys were Sage's toys and he wouldn't want to get rid of them.

Me: You can't get rid of brother's Baymax mask. Or his Minion goggles. What about this dragon?
Silas: I don't want it anymore.
Me: You played with it last week.
Silas: But I'm older now and I don't want it.

*Eye roll*

So I went through this pile of toys they left in the middle of the living room (thanks guys) and threw out everything that was missing the pieces. I bagged up everything that was still usable and we're going to take them to the Salvation Army today.

Silas and Daddy chose these toys to be donated...

It used to be that I had to do this while the kids slept so that they wouldn't see me run out of the house with the bags and put them in the trunk. Inevitably they would find something I put in the bag that they HAD to keep. Is it possible that now I can do this in the light of day???

Cue Mama Blood Boil - Yes My Son Has Autism

About a week ago I took my two sons to a celebration for a local company. They had a small bounce house, food vendors, arts and crafts, and even a snow cone truck. My sons were in heaven.

But I will tell you as soon as Sage saw the bounce house, it was on. And I had to drag him out an hour later.

Sage is almost 4, and he has Autism. If the diagnosis of Aspergers still existed, he would be diagnosed with that, but it doesn't, so we're "on the spectrum." I say "we're" because if you know a family with a child with Autism, you know it affects the whole family. His social skills are at about the 3-year-old level, and his language skills are getting much better - when he started school in August they were well below the 2-year-old range, and now we can have a conversation (even while it is generally scripted and repetitive).

That morning I really didn't know if going to this celebration was a good idea or a bad idea. Traveling with Sage can be...surprising? That's putting it nicely. I never know what's going to happen - if he's going to have fun and tell me, "I happy Mama!" or if he's going to meltdown and turn whatever get-together we're at into a screaming mess.

So I don't go out. Most weekends we stay home because...I don't know. And you may be thinking, "Well, let him try." And I totally get that. But the aftermath of a Bad Day lasts for days, makes his anxiety shoot through the roof, and sends me looking for Xanax. Or wine. Or both. My husband reacts with frustration to Sage's meltdowns, and I end up trying to mediate and console them both.

Yayyyyyy.

Anyway. That Saturday I had had enough of being in the house, the boys were getting on each others' nerves, and that was getting on my nerves, so we got dressed and went to the park. We parked it for about 30 minutes until Silas (6) told me, "I wish there were more kids. This is no fun." Totally true dude. I get you. We were alone at the park. I decided to head to this celebration and see what happened.

On the way over there I told Silas where we were going and that I was HOPING that Sage would have fun - but he knew the drill if Sage was melting down, hurting himself, or started hitting/lashing out to others. And he does. This has become our reality.

Bounce house. Right.

We get to the celebration, park, say hello to the owners, and the boys are in the bounce house. There are volunteers at all of the stations helping the kids. The woman at the bounce house was good with directing the boys (there was literally 6 boys in the house at once, all jumping into each other in a big pile of boy madness). At one point Sage started coming out and going back in like this was a game.

Sigh.

"That's OK," she told me, "I've worked with adults like him before. It's repetitive."

What you got lady?

Apparently she used to work with adults with developmental delays and disabilities. She said she recognized right away that Sage was different and that he had high functioning Autism. She asked me some questions and then told me

"Don't worry, as an adult he'll be able to live on his own and have a job like at the grocery store. It will be good for him."

I'm sorry, what?

Now, side bar. I have nothing against adults who work at grocery stores, adults with developmental delays, anything like that.

But to tell the parent of any 3-year-old that eventually he will be able to live on his own (I certainly hope so!) and hold down a minimum wage job is like...I don't even know what to compare it to.

Or maybe he can be a physicist.

You're saying at age 3 you can predict that my child, ANY CHILD, will be able to do service work of minimal cognitive effort for a career?

So...I kind of went off on her. "Oh, I certainly hope that he'll be able to go to college and find his dream career, but I doubt it will be at a grocery store. Unless he's managing it. He's very good at keeping everyone on schedule. Do you watch The Big Bang Theory? I imagine him as similar to Sheldon as an adult. And he's what, a physicist?"

Then I went and sat down while Silas went to the art table and Sage kept jumping.

Oh I forgot, you know one kid with a developmental delay, you know them all. And adults too. My bad.

Forget the Tooth Fairy, Mom

Silas has his first loose tooth. This is like a BIG DEAL. Almost all of the kids in his class have lost at least one tooth and he's been asking me about when he will lose his first tooth.

Two days ago he came home and showed me, "OMG MOM. My tooth is LOOSE." And it was. So we're waiting for his first tooth to fall out.

Silas and his first loose tooth!

Silas: Mom, what happens when my tooth falls out?
Me: We put it in this little pillow that Grandma gave us. At night the Tooth Fairy comes and takes your tooth and leaves you money!
Silas: What? That's creepy. Some guy coming in our house without us knowing and taking my tooth? What if I don't want him to take it?
Me: Well... do you want the money?
Silas: No I want to keep my tooth.
Me: So... no tooth fairy pillow?
Silas: No, that's creepy. Don't let the Tooth Fairy know I lost a tooth OK?

OK, so my super cognitive six-year-old has decided that a mythical "dude" (interesting he assumed the Tooth Fairy was a dude) coming into our house and taking his tooth is creepy. Interesting.

So...I get to save money?

Welcome to all of the Flamingos

You've heard the phrase "work/life balance" and probably felt badly about it. Because your "balance" was so out of "balance" and you thought, oh god, what am I doing wrong?

Liz rolls here eyes and shakes her head.

You're not. You're not doing anything wrong. Work/life balance is a lie. It's like...I don't know...being caught up on household chores. You think it can happen, you've heard other people do it...but it lasts for about 5 minutes and then, poof! In a puff of pink smoke, it's gone.

Here's us, trying to be balanced...

So we're chasing this idea of balance that is actually not attainable and feeling bad about it.

STOP THE MADNESS!

Most of us are balancing like the pile of dishes in your cabinet after your oldest child empties the dishwasher. Precariously. About to fall over and COULD make a big crash (and involve the purchase of paper plates instead of ceramic).

Work/life balance is more like work-lif-wor-LIFE-wo-li 

We are constantly switching back and forth, switching "hats," and sometimes, just sometimes, feeling badly that we're doing poorly in one of our roles (sometimes? let's talk about all the mommy guilt and the "mom wars" that go on between for example, working and stay-at-home moms).

So we feel as if we're constantly going, constantly trying to make something better, whatever that something of the minute is, but are you enjoying your something?

Let me make a suggestion - don't go for balance. Go for enjoyment. Enjoy what you are doing "in the now," make every effort to make what you're doing right this minute, whether it's playing Hot Wheels with your kid, working on their homework with them, working to get caught up on work stuff - enjoy it. It's here. It's now. Put the cell phone and computer away. Turn off your notifications. Don't let interruptions, well, interrupt being present with the things you're focusing on.

Be present.

You may realize that there are some things you just can't do. Because you can't do everything. You can't. So here's my strategy: figure out what you want to prioritize and focus on those things. Make a top 5. Those are your foci for now (and it will change of course, week to week sometimes). But then if something comes up that's not on your list, let it go.

If you're a parent, you probably get this reference.

This may sound crazy, because if you're like I was, you want to do everything well. After a stroke at age 30 and two heart attacks at 32, I made some clear decisions - I want to focus on what's important to me. It involved saying "no" to some things that I wanted to do but just couldn't. And it involved changing my focus sometimes. And "giving in" (not up) about others.

Some people would see that as settling. I call it looking out for your damned mental health.

So while you're trying to balance on one leg, look perfectly amazing in your Flamingo-ness, and be a super woman, stop yourself. Focus on Your Five. Let the rest go (at least for now - them dishes ain't gonna do themselves - but could you delegate them to someone else?).

What are Your Five things your focusing on right now? Comment below so other parents can see that they're not crazy.